So, I have some kind of thyroid disorder, which makes me hot, fat, sweaty, kinda bald, and frequently sleepless. In other words, sexy.
Today, I went and took a radioactive pill that they use as a diagnostic tool.
I am really hoping that it will give me the following superpowers, presented here in no particular order:
Extra face
Will look good in all pants
Automatic first-class upgrade on all flights exceeding three (3) hours
Wi-fi
Become permanent cast member of "The Hills"
Superfast court-room sketch artist skills
Not fat
